Lately, I've been thinking about what makes a person "bad." Are people either malevolent or benign innately, by nature? Or are we all a mix of good and evil? Do our choices reflect our nature?

I think of myself as a good person. I pour myself into my work; trying my best to prepare my students for their future academic rigors, as well as trying to instill in them a love of learning and excitement for life that no book can teach. I try to play my roles as sister, daughter, fiance, and friend to the best of my ability, although I don't always succeed. I believe in God, although I'm more spiritual than religious. However, I do make choices that are "bad."

I've done things that really hurt the people I love. I've done things that are just bad for me. There are things in my life, both past and present, that have/could really hurt people. Am I still deep down a good person? or am I bad?

Do good and evil fight within us? Are the proverbial demons and angels engaged in a mud wrestling match, each trying to win their cause? And can people really change?

So many questions for me, I know. But I'm in a philosophical mood. Hope everybody has a happy and safe New Years. Love and hugs to all of you!

This has been a very busy week for me, but in the good way. Tuesday I spent all day with Christine. I think we regressed to high school games because we prank called old boyfriends and even drove past her old lover's house. I know we're pathetic, but it was a lot of fun and we justified it by saying that we didn't know each other in high school, so we needed to catch up. Lame. Yes. Fun. Absolutely. Then at night we went to pick up our friend Lydia in the city and we went to Serendipity. The wait was 3 hours, so we put our name on the list and went across to Patsy's Pizza for some brick oven pizza and margarita's.

So three rounds and a lot of raunchy conversation about "pepperoni" we went back across the street for the best frozen hot chocolate ever created. It was orgasmic, that's how good it was. A few rounds of F, Marry, Kill and we went home. I spent the night at Christines, because I was too tired and too buzzed to shlep from Queens to Brooklyn. We had breakfast together that morning and I went home to shower and go see "A". He teases me that one day I'm gonna leave him for Christine. I think he's jealous...lol

Me and "A" spent Wed at the mall and then we went out for dinner, came home and talked for like 2 hours. I know that I've been going through some weird stuff and my heads been in a bad place, but I can't picture my life without him. I look into his eyes and I feel that I'm home.

Then last night I went out to a bar with about ten girls from work. We got sloshed. Most of us are in relationships, but that didn't stop us from flirting with the hotties that were there, not that there were many.

So basically this week I got no school work done. Hopefully I can catch up today. Now, I'm off to see what's been going on in my blogstream family's life.

This Christmas was very good to me. I got enough clothes to start a brand new wardrobe and I finally got the Easy Bake Oven that I've been wanting forever! I know that I'm in my twenties, but there's something about desserts that are cooked by a little light bulb that really gets me excited. It was nice to see all my family together and all in all it was a great holiday. I also got a "Vote For Pedro" T-shirt which I haven't taken off since yesterday because I love it so much. Napolean Dynomite is probably one of my favorite movies.

I am off from work until January 3rd and I am so friggen happy you have no idea I do have a lot of papers to grade and my plan book is a mess, but no kids to throw up or pass out for a whole week. I'm going to have to spend a big bulk of this week spending those gift certificates. Hope you all had a great holiday!!!

I just wanted to wish everyone on the Stream a happy and healthy holiday. You are all such wonderful people and I truely hope that all of you are able to celebrate with your loved ones. Merry Christmas

Yesterday, I was practicing with my class for the Christmas show tomorrow with another second grade teacher and her class. They were in their lines, singing their songs, and doing their little dances when one little girl in the front row started to sway, her face went pale and she looked like she was going to faint. I grabbed her arms before she hit the ground. She was unresponsive for 30 seconds, although it felt like hours. Finally she sat up and started talking. I, along with the other teacher, managed to get the other kids out of the room, get the AP, and call 911 in a matter of seconds. FDNY, NYPD, and EMS were all there within minutes. She's fine, she just didn't eat lunch and got dizzy from the dancing, but I was really scared. My insides were all twisted up for hours after school was over. I'm telling you between the fainting and the vomiting in my classroom, I'll be in the loony bin by Valentines Day!!!

On another note, I think that I'm the only person who supports this transit strike. Besides the fact that my school is on a two hour delay and I don't have the kids until 10:30 (even though I have to be in at the same time). Somebody has to stand up to Bloomberg. He treats his city workers like crap. He pays us just enough to get by, never enough to get ahead. I understand that this is a major inconvenience for millions of commuters and businesses, but these guys are fighting for their pension; for thier benefits. They really have some balls to strike like this and I give them a lot of credit. Maybe if the teacher's weren't sold down the river by the UFT we could have striked and gotten a decent contract. As a civil servant myself, it really pisses me off that we get treated like this. NYC is a rich city, pay the damned workers! Thanks, just had to vent.